Lovely Legs

A big part of my journey is about acknowledging my body, its importance and how toxic I have let it get.

When you have body image issues you tend to obsess about being the Victim you are and not about the LOVE you should be showing.

My mind has had a real renewal in the last few months.  Im beginning to see ME.

This morning I got my son to take a full body photo (clothed) so that I could use one of those FREE Apps on my iPhone that can make you look skinny.

The photo I chose I was at first really pleased with and thought.. wow I dont look too bad.. then I applied the "skinnyfier"  and suddenly that first real photo didnt look so good.  For the first time I had seen a thinner version of myself and I was happy..

It really helped me focus on my journey.  I now see how I can be thinner.  This then effects my actions and reactions and choices.

Today whilst my boys were having fun at a Kids event I had an unexpected couple of hours child free and as I was only 10 mins from my favourite Chinese Massage place I decided to take the opportunity to have my back and legs massaged.

I have decided April to June will be LEG health focus. So today I had an OIL massage done on my legs.  I have never let anyone massage my bare legs before and I must say it was liberating and amazing.  

Whilst having my 50 min massage there was music playing and it happened to be chinese style instrumental music.. I was trying to use this soothing sound to meditate and help with any pain that arose from pressure point the massage dealt with.  Suddenly when some fleshy kneading was taking place the song "Change my heart o Lord" came on.. the words are ingrained on my heart so I knew the chorus lyrics are :

You are the Potter, 

I am the clay; 

Mold me and make me, 

This is what I pray

I started to feel emotional and my mouth salivated badly as I stuffed back the urge to cry.  I had been praying for God to intervene with my body transition.  And suddenly this song AND Amazing Grace were playing.. God knew these two song would speak to me and help me allow the massage to have the maximum benefit.  I felt like God was working through the masseuse in her work and I don't if she was in touch with the energy I was emitting but she seemed to do just the right things!

I'm so grateful for this HOLISTIC journey and the person I am becoming!