Sometimes you need to look at life from a different perspective!

I'm an over organiser.  I always arrive Early, I over pack and I over plan.. this I always prided myself in as a quality.  Now I am seeing its my way of "being in control" and I see now it actually caused me more work and more stress.

Gabriel Method has taught me to "go with the flow" a bit more.  Be flexible, Be spontaneous and be less stressed..

AND I LOVE IT!

Yesterday was my birthday and I had friend coming for the afternoon.. Normally I would be stroppy and panicky wanting everything just perfect.  I would set up my expectations so high that the reality was so under my estimations I would feel disappointed and stressed.  We had such a lot to do before guest arrived as Tom has been away working interstate most of the week and had jobs outside he needed to do for me before I could even begin to set up my High Tea birthday.  Instead of waking up on my birthday stressing I really enjoyed myself.  I relaxed, I enjoyed opening the gifts from my kids and husband.  I leisurely made my breakfast.  I finished preparing a few treats I had made for the High Tea and then at 10am I went shopping on my own.. something I would normally drag the whole family out and we would all be annoyed at each other.. etc

It was lovely going on my own.  I knew one thing i wanted to buy (my Blender) and I had researched the one I wanted so went straight to that shop, I didn't have to wait or argue with kids.. I just made my purchase... but after that purchase I was free to choose. 

I decided to get my hair cut.. No appointment just chose the location of a hairdressers I wanted to try.  When I got there she was too busy to fit in a walk in, I felt a bit disappointed and thought Oh well it can wait.. so I went to the nearby green grocers and checked out some speciality shops then as I was walking back to the car I passed the hairdressers again and I noticed it was empty and a staff member was looking bored so I cheekily asked again if they were available.. and BINGO.. her appointment hadn't turned up and I could be fit in.. turned out to be the BEST thing ever.. she understood my hair needs we chatted, laughed and I really enjoyed myself and then when finished I was super happy with the result.. and then the price... $21.50  BARGAIN.. I usually pay $26 at Just-cuts .. Thanks Sheering Shed hair dressers in Regents Park you made my birthday a treat... http://www.facebook.com/shearingshedenteratownrisk

I got home and its was about 12pm and my guests would be arriving at 2.30pm.  I had a lot to do to make my home good and my husband still hadn't finished getting the outside entertainment dining area ready to set up. So instead of getting cranky and resentful I just set to doing a few jobs and thought .. "its ok.. its the company not the food or trimmings that is important" (<A very new concept to me).

I vacuumed and tidied and got stuck into the tasks at hand.. I got enough done that were important and then had time to choose an outfit and change.  I wore a dress I haven't worn for over a year because last time I tried it on it didn't fit my bust and stomach area and just wasnt comfortable; my arms were a disgrace in it... this time it was just perfect, the dress part was loose, the bust area fit fine (though my darling boobs are impressively obvious still), and my arms are looking amazing and I felt GREAT in it.  The High Tea was a great time with beautiful friends.

Not the best angle to show off my face but I love this photo all the same!
My upper arms are smooth and you can see I have shoulders!! 

Today.. my kids begged us to see The Croods at the cinema.. they has missed out during the holidays and I said daddy might take them.. We went to shopping centre/cinema complex together and I decided NOT to see the film but to use the time to do stuff on my own.

I'm liking this "On My Own" milarky.. why have I always been so dependant on someone else's company to enjoy myself or window shop!  I had birthday money to spend so I chose to utilise a $20 off birthday voucher I received and purchase two very sweet silver rings.  One says LOVE and other says LOVE, HOPE, FAITH.  These represent my journey very well.

Enjoying time on my own represents a HUGE change in me.  It means I can trust my own company, trust myself, enjoy my own company without getting bored or lonely and I am emotionally LIVING in the real world not hiding behind some one else for security.  I feel confident and competent and fearless.

This year I am having to learn to be independent as my husband has to work interstate every week and so is away from home at least 50% of the week.    I am learning to be ok with just being on my own.  I'm learning to be independent (sure I still enjoy being waited on by hubby when he is home)  But I have the opportunity to do things for myself .. giving myself permission to be ME.

Slowly as a family we are working through quality time with each other, not just as husband and wife but with our kids as individuals.  However, next weekend hubby and I are being treated to a weekend away.. my BFF is having my kids and paying for us to have a weekend date!.  What a blessing to our marriage.  Its good timing for us as we have had little time alone to be US.. not mum and dad.  

This year we celebrate 20 years of married life... this is a great year!